tmr for vacation =)

i hope i can be super happy when i go to vacation with my family.. already very long time didn't go for a holiday with my family jor.. i want to used this opportunities to relax myself.. i really want to going to a trip happily.. i don wan to sad anymore.. i wish i can be more mature thinking o..i want peaceful life.. im know i with her maybe no chance anymore because this time she is already very serious..everytime i just think about her.. think about her whether she happy? she unhappy?? she bored?? this time i gonna think of myself.. i want be happy without her.. i can do it jeff.. haha.. so confident lo but don know can or not.. haiz.. today i finally took the undang ezam.. i so shock i passed because i study in the last minute.. haha.. hy passed too.. quite happy to heard this news.. we two also passed leh.. so great.. haha.. she sure will be very happy de o.. hui hui they all failed lo just hy passed oni o.. pity them la.. haiz.. hope next time they all can passed o.. hy: all the best in the next ezam o ^^

no comment for this!!

Today early in the morning i woke up to prepare myself for going to sunway pyramid with my primary friend, sharon.. hahaha.. today just three person going there oni... actually is not so boring la.. quite fun can hang out v sharon and her friend.. haha.. today we watched a funny movie lo.. quite funny de its really makes me laugh a lot.. at least i laugh i wont think so much ma.. haha.. today i got call her go sunway v me de lo but she didn't reply me o.. don know wat she wan.. haiz.. no manners at all ask her thing wont answer de... l already having this habit with her lo.. also wont angry but got a bit unhappy lo.. because yesterday still said im her 'best friend' o... cheh.. today lea?? treat me as wat?? don wan to reply me... its okay i forgive her.. tmr we having a undang exam o.. hope she can pass o.. i will pray for her later ^^ she sure gonna get full mark.. hahahaha.. hope so la... wish tmr we will meet o..

special day

Today afternoon i went to play badminton with my brothers and teoh.. hehe so fun we all play until almost 4 hour.. haha.. so sweat lo... when i was playing, she suddenly miss call me leh super happy la that time.. thn i call her back lo.. wow.. she answer leh.. very long din hear her voice that was so sweet.. haha.. happy until like wanna fly up to the sky.. haha.. finally she admit im her best friend o.. don know why suddenly she said im his best friend.. i hope im her bf = boy friend not best friend.. haha.. i was so wealthy o.. haha.. just hope our relationship can improve to couple one day ♥

two day didn't update

when kheng ann's birthday she said she didnt go to his house but she reached there by 10 o clock.. hahaha.. so happy when i saw her.. that day i ask her via msg and she finally reply me leh.. quite happy de lo.. that day we both also take picture leh so shuang leh.. haha... i feel that she still wanna fren v me... just expect her to treat me better lo.. haha.. that night siang foo and i stay at kheng ann's house leh.. so song.. about 1something morning and its christmas jor leh we all went to mamak lo.. so late jor we all walk to beside 99 de mamak o.. haha.. so many ppl there.. when we reach back kheng ann's house already 3 something jor.. hahaha.. and i 7 something oni sleep at that night.. because play dota v hien they all.. haha.. so late oni sleep lo.. yesterday i realise that my sim card lost jor.. T.T very sad la.. inside got 40something.. yo.. so careless so wasted o.. i hope i can find back lo.. i believe i still can call her once again de.. aiyo.. today hor she din reply me AGAIN o.. don know why she wan like that again.. haiiyoooooo... already a habit la.. just hope don care so much and think so much lo...

One week jor

She already one week don wan to reply my msg, answer my phone call and don wan to care about me.. haiz... so suffer lo this week.. i also no heart to study undang jor.. i also very tired jor i hope i can stop thinking lo.. tmr is kheng ann birthday.. i hope she really want to attend to kheng ann's party... i hope everything will be fined later.. tis few day i cant sleep lo.. yesterday night i 5 o'clock am only start to lying on the bed.. that was too late jor.. i don wan de but don know why cant sleep.. haiz.. today pmr result coming out jor.. my both cousin sister consider get good result... one get 5A one get 3A.. not bad o... and my gan mei mei get 1A oni o.. hahaha...

thinking of u

Today i hang out with chung hwa high school's fren.. they all very friendly lo.. they make me laugh, happy and in a mood... today we went to pyramid lo.. we go red box sing k, shopping at the shopping mall and take some photos.. it was awesome.. hahaha.. but when i was there im still thinking about her.. don know why.. sometimes im just very quiet an there.. they keep asking me why i was so quiet but i just said im tired.. hahaha.. today someone say me very leng zai o.. hahaha.. so song.. but i wish the person who say me leng zai is her.. hahaha.. i think she also wont reply my msg tonight.. i need to start worried about her again.. i feel that she like blaming herself lo.. don know why she want like that.. i hope she wont hate herself because of me.. i don wan her to HATE herself.. i rather she hate me.. i don wan see her unhappy lo.. i will feel very sad when she hate herself.. i hope she will be okay soon.. GOD i pray for u to wish her happy always..

out of mood

Today morning i went to SEGI college with my father to having a course.. that course is talked by one of their lecturer in this college.. wow.. he was awesome when he speaked... actually is was quite boring de.. but no choice i have to hear.. now i still considering that which college or university that i enter... quite difficult to make a decision on this.. just let my parents to decide lo.. haha.. today o she still don wan to reply me... don know why she wan to do like that.. actually im still her friend de but she like not treaten me like a friend leh... i really scare she don wan to fren v me... just hope she will change her mind one day... i want her to reconsider me.. i make a promise to myself that i wan to change!!! i wanna changed a person that u like.. i hope she will realize me that i have change for her.. hope so~~

sorry

Just now she finally reply me.. she just replied me one msg oni.. the msg she wrote is "sorry" and "good night"... i shock lo.. i can feel that she's unhappy now.. i very worried about her.. GOD pls help us both to become more happy can?? pls... i rather alone unhappy also don wan she's unhappy and sad.. i don wan her to suffer this.. she unhappy all is because of me.. it is my reponsibility to make sure she cnt be unhappy but i failed.. haiz.. i hope i can always done the right thing, i hope i can always make her happy to become the happiest person in the world, i hope i can always do the thing that she like most, i hope she always smile and no unhappy face, i hope i can be her perfect person that wont make her angry and the last i hope i can become her everything who makes her smile, happy, laugh, feel proud and happiness =)

haiz~~~~

Another day she don wan to choi me.. quite suffer lo.. i cant endure anymore its really make me upsad.. now she treated me like a stranger again.. already so many days and don know why she still like that.. really don know what she thinking.. haiz.. i just scare we two fren also cnt be.. don know why she keep having a negative thinking.. she VERY stubborn.. this is one of her disadvancetage lo.. i want to happy but don know why i cant.. our promise is a lie.. WHY?? T.T.. haiz.. i know her more than i know myself.. i know whats she's thinking.. she want me to give up thats why she wanted to treat me like that.. she purposely like that de i know.. if she want like that i also cant do anything.. haiz.. whatever she like lo.. at least she feel happy can jor ^^ yesterday night i went RC night.. its awesome leh.. BUT im not happy at all because someone absent.. haiz.. i just wan she go but she don wan.. haiz.. i heard a lots of rc members keep shouting.. haha.. they all very enjoy but im not.. i wish i could really happy when kheng ann's birthday.. because she maybe got go to his house.. haha.. although im nothappy but i also just hope she HAPPY, HAPPY AND HAPPY!!!

feel SAD

Yesterday she really din find me at all.. the whole day i wait her to find me and she didn't.. haiz.. so today the same.. i feel so disappointed on her.. why she want treat me like this??? why?? i really wanna know?? haiz.. she even don wan to give the answer that i wanna know.. just feel disappointed and super sad.. everyday i looks like very strong but my heart was weak.. nowadays i keep telling myself must be strong but last night i cried.. quite a long time i didn't cry for her jor.. haiz.. why she wan to hurt me again? is it me too annoying??? actually i didn't make her angry lo.. don know why she like hate me and bu shuang me? why? i wanna know what she thinking.. i also wanna know whats inside her mind??? GOD, pls help me.. i really need your help.. our relationship must be safe.. PLS i beg you GOD...

good and bad

Today early in the morning i woke up and i miss call her.. i had msg her but she din reply.. about 7 something the driver reached my house and fetch me to kampung jawa.. i was shock when i heard the driver said need to pick up 9 person.. we just sitting on a van la.. hahaha.. arrive at there abot 9 something jor and i was very happy.. u know why?? hahaha.. i really saw her there.. they attend the courses are same with me.. so song.. we also together in the same room when hearing the course.. hahaha.. actually this course is quite boring but i also got pay a bit attention lo... hahaha.. this is the good news =)  After we leave the place we will seperate to go home by the uncles.. hahaha... i very miss her when she left lo.. don know why maybe is we had a long time din meet each other.. i wonder today did i disturb her or not?? don know she will feel that i fan??? hahaha.. i no dare to ask her because i cnt ask this kind of thing anymore.. don piss her off better.. haha... therefore, i msg her and she din reply me again.. its okay o.. until night i just msg her for wishing her 'good night'.. everytime we meet she just like nothing to talk v her.. this is her style i already having this habit to suit myself.. haha.. the problem that i worry is tmr.. everytime after the day we meet she will don wan to choi me o.. but i already xi guan la.. haha.. i will not so sad la.. just sad for a while lo.. 5 minutes enough =) hope tmr she really will find me o~~ this is the bad news lo.. haha

happy ^^

Today i went out with teoh, kar fatt, wan yee, christine, and hero.. hahaha.. we went to bukit tinggi jusco watch " NARNIA".. this movie is awesome... hehe.. some action was so super funny and some of the part was so touching.. hehe.. quite a nice story i like it.. unfortunately, she cant join us to watch this movie.. got two reason.. the 1st reason is noboday can fetch her go out and she even don wan to come out.. the 2nd reason is she already watched this movie with her family.. too bad so sad.. hope next time she can really hang out with us.. tmr is a quite nervous day.. hehe.. because im having a undang course for 6 hour... hahaha.. sound like very boring lo.. tmr me, kheng ann, xiu chun and leong kheng will going too... and the others going other side is she lo, wan yee, hui hui and don know who jor.. haha.. hope tmr really can meet them lo.. because hor i really very very miss her o.. don know why i wanna see her right now.. hahaha.. sounds funny lo she will never miss me again i think. don know gua don wan guess jor.. hehe.. after spm lor.. just wish OUR relationship will become much more better.. i wan our feeling back only this is wat i wan.. thats all =) hope her hapi always ^^

last day in school

Today i went to school wanna give the RC night money to Christine BUT when i reached my school, inside totally empty.. i just realize that everybody was gone.. everyone go back home already and i so stupid reached there earlier because my art test begin at 2.00pm.. not only give the money and my pendrive over Emily there i wanna take it back but she also go back jor.. I also wan to borrow my memory card to her de lo but i miss it too.. hahaha.. they all are going back home sooo fast and i rushing to school jor at last i cant make it in time.. its okay lo next time oni meet them..today when i drawing, one of the pengawai praise me.. she said " wa u sangat pandai hor boleh lukis two kertas dalam 3 jam " hahaha.. when i heard that i was so happy.. haha.. i really done two paper in 3 hour.. haha..it was to fast already.. i hope i can get an A in this test.. today also is my last time to wear my school uniform and step in my school.. so next year oni can go back to school.. hehe... SMK sultan abdul samad BYE BYE.. hahaha.. today she said ERT was easy o.. she so confident she can pass and i hope she can get credit in this subject..

down down down

My mood keep down and i don know whats the reason is.. haiz.. i trying to be happy but i can't!! yesterday night i having a conversation with her.. starting we both communicate happily de and then don know why suddenly ME don know talking about what make her a bit unhappy.. maybe is im thinking about last time lo,, haiz.. don know la... some memories cannot be remember BUT i keep mention it so make her feel so angry and disappointed.. i was so regret again.. today morning we chat a while but she said she have nothing to talk with me.. i was so shock when she said like that.. maybe she still thinking yesterday night de thing.. i hope she can think it positively lo.. i already changed a lot but she din realize it.. how come she didn't feel that i already changed???? its okay i will prove it more obviously to her... and this few day she sick jor... quite worry about her and i wish i can take care her but i cant.. sometimes i will act like her boyfriend i also don know why i will like that.. i was so HATE myself why i have this kind of attitude.. i just wanna happy life with her and din have others distraction... i wish her sick will be recover faster and i will pray for her^^ and i hope she will known me that i have changed a lot because of her.. said NO to last time memories!! haha

feeling no good

Today i went to school to do some practice drawing, at least i learn something.. haha.. Teacher said 12pm will be reach school but i the one who late.. hahaha.. i draw a few pieces of paper only because teacher going back by 2.30pm.. the time was too short is no enough time to let us to practice... after practicing, i walk back alone and i try to call her but she didn't answer my call.. just feel a bit disappointed lo.. at night i called her but she got a bit tired and we just talking for a while only.. just now i feel so uncomfortable and don know the reason why.. haiz.. i sense something bad gonna happen on me.. i told this to her and i made her feel scare, so sorry about that.. she said today i had think a lots of memories when we both are sweet last time.. she also asked me why i need to think about last time and i don know how to answer her.. just feel im wrong again.. something i cnt told her but i already did that.. i asked her if her computer network can be access to the internet will she still will treat me like now??? she straight away unhappy.. i feel so regret when i asked her this question.. sorry ying~~~

Missing you

Today i very concern about hy because she said she cheat in the hall when she having the account paper.. i don know wan to believe or not but i have to.. hahaha.. who call me im so trust her always.. i heard one of my friend said today account test paper quite difficult, i worry about her because her account subject no so confident de.. hope she can pass o and get good result too... finally she wont so stress anymore because still got 3 more day to rest.. her finally subject is on 13 december, i wish she can relax o.. just after spm she will be very very happy because no need to STUDY anymore.. hahaha.. hope after spm she can find a proper jod.. she so lazy don know can find good job or not.. hahaha.. tmr i need to go to school because my teacher call me to go to practice my art test.. i hope it can help me much o ^^ i sure can get an A in my art test o~~~~

Boring day

After spm is getting more boring and more boring.. Nothing to do at home, just know how to play, eat and sleep.. hahaha.. just like a useless person.. today i called her once again, she said today test paper was so difficult but i think she can get good result.. we talk quite a long time i was so happy but i got a habit which don wan to end my call.. hahaha.. we both said bye already but at last will keep continue talking its so fun.. haha.. i remember one time we both chat about the 'bye bye' word for half and hour.. this half and hour we keep saying bye bye o.. haha.. sooooo childish la us.. hahaha.. mention about childish i really need to CHANGE my childish attitude.. she don't like im childish and i really need to prove to her that im MAN.. hahaha.. next time i try to be man and no more childish attitude.. i hope i do everything can improve our relationship o~~~ i wish tmr account test she know how to do.. hope she can happy with her result and she MUST get an A in her spm.. i know she can de because got my fully surpport.. hahaha.. okay la.. its time to sleep o good night ^^

Another cheerful day =)

Today i went to midvally with my family.. the reason go there is SHPPING!!! hahaha.. and took my cousin's phone which is repaired at there.. I bought a formal shirt and a short pant ^^ on the 18th of december i finally get my parents permission to go to the RC night.. This RC night is organize by the PBSM members.. they all beg me to go so i just go lo.. my class nobody going but i just go for fun at least my parents allow ar.. hahahaha.. One more super happy things is SHE finally answer my call... hahaha.. i was so happy today.. when i at midvally that time she suddenly miss call me.. i was shock and i call her back.. while i shopping i talking v her.. sooooo much fun o.. hahaha.. really very happy although i kena scold by my parents.. hahaha.. After spm my luck is coming back.. WOOHOOOO... SHUANG ar... hahaha... today must be sleep until very SWEET =D

happy day ^^

Today chemistry it was my last exam which i study so much.. after this subject i can relax jor.. hahaha.. 13th dec still got another subject but that's seni paper 2.. just need to draw oni so i can relax whole a week jor.. Today test is quite difficult.. many question i don know how to do but i already try my best.. my tuition teacher's ramalan is not accurate and its make me so much disappointed because i read all the note didn't come out.. T.T its okay already past so i also wont care so much.. the happiest thing is today SHE finally reply my msg.. sooooo happy.. although her msg is short but i really appreciate it.. i wish i could call her and she'll answer my call.. BUT i must learn how to tolerate myself because this kind of thing cannot be so rush.. i must have the habit to learn independently without her.. so that i wont every times distract her.. i know she will not concern me anymore because she already don care about my things.. quite sad i mention this.. haha.. just HOPE one day she will come back~~~~

One month after

Today is 5th december.. I have been unhappy, moody and depressed for one whole month.. Almost every night i can't sleep well because of our relationship problem.. before this month is one of my friend birthday is on the 5th of november.. I still remember that day we went to 88 restaurant to having a dinner party.. that day i was soooooo much regret that I make her so dislike and i have did some attitude problem that she don like.. haiz.. After that day, she didn't find me at all and i msg her she didn't reply.. until the third day she finally reply me at night.. i was so happy when i receive her msg but unfortunately the msg is about..................... haiz... The truth that i can't accepted... When i think back our memories i will be very unhappy because just like everything suddenly disappears..But sometimes it will bring me some sweet smile.. Sweet memory that she's gorgeous, pretty, cute. and special.. last time we both are so sweet.. every moment we spent together i will appreciate it because its bring a lots of fun, happiness, and meaningful life.. after our relationship become more complicated, she keep calling me to forget everything about her.. but i can't because i'm loving her so deep.. examples like i just cannot be pull up like a tree with a lots of roots.. Although she treat me not as good as last time but i will also treat her the best.. i'm believe in miracle so that i hope she will change her mind after spm.. i won't give up anything because i know that if i give up already i have nothing.. if i din give up perhaps still got a little of chance.. I just want her to feel more happy.. Ying~~ must be cheerful always ya ^^

A disappointed day

Today i went to my friends' house for the group study.. I learn quite a lots because i finally have the mood to study.. hahaha.. At first, i think i will be nothing today but study until half i suddenly cry because a lots of memories suddenly appears in my mind.. i don know wat to do so i just went to the kitchen to hide myself.. luckily my friends didn't realise that im crying.. we already had many days didn't chat v each other.. everyday i will msg her but at last she didn't reply me once.. sometimes feel very sad about that, i really don know what she's thinking... i hope i can really know wat she want.. Just now i log on my fb and i went to her page.. i suddenly shock when i saw one of her post that she said she was depressed... At that moment i feel so unhappy don know why she having this problem... after that i sent a msg to her and ask what happen but she didn't reply me once again or maybe she slept already.. I hope i can receive her msg by tmr morning.. I wish she will reply me... i will pray for her by wishing her be happy and cheerful everyday ^^

A lonely night

Tonight i can't sleep well again.. this problem is being even worse.. After our relationship becoming complicated, i can't sleep every night its just like a nightmare.. i'm miss her so much now.. i have lots of things want to share v her but it's no chance anymore... Although she brings me so much of emo but at least  i didn't blame her.. I just hope that she can treated me like last time but its difficult.. Perhaps she wont changes her mind because of ME.. i making this blog is to release all my unhappy things and all my stress here i hope it can help me.. sometimes i can being emo in the whole day don know why nobody can comfort me accept her... i know she won't comfort me anymore whenever i sad or something happen... when last time she always encourage me to be happy when i was sad but she said she hate to comfort ppl so much.. when i heard wat she said i was suddenly being upset.. I wish i could sleep well tonight, i wish she will reply my message, i wish i can be cheer up, i wish i could stand the suffer. i wish she will find me when she's boring, i wish i could have a happiness life with her.... END =(